One Week and Counting

I looked at the blog tonight and realized that I am about two weeks behind. I will be sure to get caught up today.

It hit me tonight how little time I have left here in Nepal. Next week at this time I will be back in the USA. It is certainly with mixed emotions that I have started packing and saying my goodbyes. My friend Jennie sent me a link to a blog being written by a doctor who is working in Guatemala. She had returned home to the USA for a short time for Christmas. She like anyone who spends time in a developing country aka “third world country” experienced the struggles of coping with the vastly different socioeconomic situations of the USA versus these developing countries. She said that it was challenging to see the vast wealth, spending, and indulgences without recognition of the injustice. Having been fortunate enough to travel quite a bit to developing countries, I have often felt the same. But I also know from past experience that I will gradually become desensitized to the “abundance” and slip back into my status quo of daily life….. a life where I spend on one meal what it would cost to send a child to school for a year in Nepal. It is a difficult balancing act to enjoy the bounties of life in the US whilst having the knowledge that there is so much poverty and need in a country you have grown to love. I have yet to learn how to find peace somewhere in the middle.

Over The Last Few Weeks

In an attempt to get “caught up” I will give you the readers digest condensed version of the past two weeks. Last I wrote I had just returned home from my trip to Badagaun. I was in Kathmandu only about 24 hours when I was off again. This time I was headed to Ganesh’s village with some Choice people too look at the potential of adding classrooms to the school there. As I wrote in a previous entry, there are more than 550 students in the school and they only have 10 classrooms. Some rooms have 65 students in them. Bekke, a friend of mine back in the USA read the blog, then emailed me and said she wanted to raise funds to help build additional classrooms. I went with Bishnu and Kiran to let them have the opportunity to evaluate the situation and make suggestions. It was a very productive trip and I think that we will be able to make a notable difference there.

I was back in Kathmandu only a few short days before I was supposed to head back to Besishahar for the inauguration of the school. During the short time in Kathmandu Lynn and I were able to go and do some shopping for Bharat. We found a great medical supply store that had most of what we needed. We were able to get him a year supply of catheters and sterile gloves, a back rest and several “doughnuts” to help with the bed sores, some dense foam pads to soften his wheel chair seat and back and then extra sheets and towels so he doesn’t have to be in constant contact with damp, dirty sheets, and then a myriad of other things to help make his life easier we hope. Finally we were able to have a triangle bar made that will be installed above his bed to allow him to do exercises and to eventually change positions by himself while in bed.

So after a few days of relaxing and getting caught up with some friends I was off once again with Kiran to Besishahar and then to Pasachaur. With all the recent travel, I have grown tired of traveling in overcrowded buses and vans. So I suggested to Kiran that we get a car and driver. Kiran was able to arrange a minivan and Kiran, his wife and sister-in-law, the school masters son and I were off. I can barely count how many times I have driven this same road since I have been here. I was hoping for an uneventful trip, but got something a little different. About 3 hours into the trip, the driver wanted to pull into a café to get something to eat. It is a café I have been to before and had no interest in eating there. Kiran and his family had eaten breakfast and they were not hungry either. The driver pushed the issue a little and then drove on. Suddenly he began driving erratically and very fast. He was accelerating into the turns, making crazy passes and downright scaring us. Kiran asked him to slow down a couple of times, but to no avail. He accelerated around a particularly sharp corner to find that a small landslide had left many rocks scattered on the road. Instead of slowing down like a sane person might do, he instead sped up hitting the rocks at a high speed. We made it to the other side of the rocks safely, but the van started making a horrible knocking noise. Again, a sane, normal person would stop to see what the cause of the noise was, but not this driver. We went for about 20 more minutes before pulling into a road side repair shop. It turns out that one of the rear shocks had been ripped from the frame by one of the rocks. As we waited for the van to be repaired we had a chance to talk with the head master’s son who was sitting in the front seat. He informed us that the reason the driver was driving so crazy was because we didn’t stop to eat dal bhat. Turns out the drivers get a commission from the roadside restaurants when they bring their passengers to eat. By us not eating, he missed out on about 200.00Rs or about $3.00US and that made him furious. The stupidity of that scenario baffles me. The funny thing is that because of his tempter, not only was he out the 200.00Rs he missed out on from the commission, but he also had to pay to get his van fixed. The good news was that during the time it took for the van to be fixed, he had clamed down and the rest of the drive to Besishahar was relatively mellow. He got even with us though later in the day when we asked him to drive us a short distance further than originally agreed, and although he was going in that direction anyway, he refused to give us a ride. The whole scenario was quite humorous looking back on it.

We made the quick 30 minute walk to Pasachaur to find the inauguration celebrations in full force. We had missed out on the dance competition and other events, but not too late to get involved with the celebrations. It was good to be with the people of Pasachaur once again. I wasn’t there even 2 minutes when I felt a tug on one of my fingers and when I looked down I found my little friend. He was my constant companion when I was in the village with the women and now again he was by my side. He doesn’t say much, he just looks at me and smiles a lot.

We were invited to stay in the home of the Bhandari family. They are a very kind young family who went above and beyond to make us feel comfortable. They have three children a daughter who is 16 and two sons one 14 and one 12. On my first visit to the village with the choice expedition the mother of this family came to us concerned because her 12 year old son had a severe headache. After talking with Saroj (the son) it was clear that he was suffering from a migraine. It was his first ever, but as classic as they come. Being a migraine sufferer myself I know how miserable this can be. I remember my first migraine. I am not sure exactly how old I was, but I think maybe 6. If my memory serves me right, it took my parents a while to believe me that pain was as severe as I said it was. But once they did they were great to take care of me when a migraine came on. My mom would massage my temples and keep a cool compress over my eyes. I was able to give Saroj some Tylenol and do for him the things my mom did for me. The next morning he was back to normal and his mother was of course very grateful that he was okay.

The Bhandari Family

The next day we spent the entirety of the day at the school for the inauguration. Much to my dislike I was one of the guests of honor and was treated with an over abundance of favor and attention. To make matters worse the local government officials and the directors of the other NGO involved in the school were all very late, so the villagers had only me to dote upon. Once all the guest had arrived the ceremony started. Little did I know at the time it started that it would last for 7 hours. The government officials in Nepal love to talk (sounds just like government officials in the US), and talk they did. Unbeknownst to me Kiran took a picture of me about 5 hours into the ceremony. I have the glazed over appearance of someone who has long since become bored and mentally detached from the moment….and that it how I was.

5 hours into ceremony…with all my garb

To make matters worse there were quite a few government officials present at the meeting. Right now in Nepal there are 7 recognized parties. They all have to be recognized in order for one party to not feel left out. This means that even the Maoist have to be included, which always infuriates me. I have been to quite a few ceremonies where the Maoists are present and I go out of my way to avoid them. To make matters worse at this particular ceremony, the Maoist leader was someone that Kiran knew.

About two weeks prior to this ceremony Kiran had invited me to a memorial service for a friend and fellow school teacher who was taken out of his classroom one day about 5 years ago by some Maoists, was walked up the hill behind the school, and was slain. I am not certain that I understand why, but the Maoists have a particular interest in school teachers and they go out of their way to harass them and extort money from them. If the Maoist even think that the school teachers do not support them or their cause, the will kill them with no second thought. Kiran was once a school teacher, but after the death of his friend and fearing for his life, he fled to Kathmandu to get away from the Maoists.

As the ceremony droned on, Kiran leaned over to me and told me that the Maoist leader that was sitting at his side was in fact the man responsible for the slaying of his friend 5 years back. I cannot tell you how badly that infuriated me. I could barely stay in my seat as I wanted to walk over and pound this pathetic little man as he sat there so pompous and proud. Knowing that it would not be in anyone’s best interest, I resorted to dagger stares and looks that could kill.

When the ceremony came to a close, we were once again invited to stay with the Bhandaris. We had originally planned only to stay one night in the village, but due to the length of the ceremony, there was not time for us to leave. Word quickly spread that we were staying another night and before long plans were made for singing and dancing. This was devastating news for me, because I knew it meant that I would have to spend my evening dancing, not just observing….and I can tell you that me dancing is not a pretty sight. Sure enough once the dinner of dal bhat was finished out came the drums and the villagers started arriving.

During our previous stay in the village with the choice expedition, the women and I were asked to dance over and over. The Nepali style of dance is VERY different from anything I have ever seen or done, and to be quite honest it is very difficult for me to dance. I usually start dancing Nepali style and before long and doing some retarded free style dance. During one of the dances the women and I started dancing the Macarena. One of the guys named Uttam came out and started dancing with us and before long had the dance down (not like it is a hard dance to learn).

Uttam and Kiran in the village. Note the tika powder all over Kiran

While we were away, he had taught it to some other people and now he wanted me to dance it with him. Had I known that he would remember it and like it, I would have found the music and brought it back with me. I have since found the cd and will send it back to the village with Kiran so he can experience the Macarena with the actual music and not just drums.

The next morning we departed the village and I headed for Pokhara and Kiran to his village. I wanted to go back to Pokhara for a few days to spend some time with Dilip and his family and recoup a little after being back in a village. Plus I needed to kill a couple of days before I was to meet the Tophams yet again in Damauli to go and visit Bharat and his family one last time and deliver some items that we had purchased (thanks to some money that Ben and Megan had sent) to help make his life a little more bearable and hopefully comfortable. My time in Pokhara was great. I was able to hang out with Dilip and his family and eat some good food.

Two days later I met up with the Tophams and we headed to Pokhari Bhanjyage with the back of the car full of items for Bharat. It was great to find him sitting outside in his wheel chair in the sun. He said he was feeling much better and actually stronger from the exercises we had taught him.

Bharat and his wife in front of their home

Bharat’s bed where he spends most of his days

We showed him the stuff we had brought and explained how it was to be used. If he uses everything we brought I am confident that he will be free of bed sores and UTIs, and that he will be far more comfortable in his day to day life. We then pulled his wife aside and talked to her about the idea of providing her with a micro loan to start a little store out of their home. She started to cry and said that she had wanted to do this, but she didn’t know where she would get the money to do it. She went on to say that there are two other stores within about an hour or twos walk from her home, but that both were closing down and the villagers need a store. It was almost providential. We talked through the details and picked a location to “build” a small room for the store off of their front porch. It will be idea as Bharat will be able to wheel himself right into the store and all the items will be within reach for him.

After talking to his wife, we went out and told Bharat of the idea and asked him what he thought. He too, got teary eyed and said that he liked the idea very much. He said it would allow him to help provide for his family and that made him very happy…which is exactly what we had hoped for.

We think it would take less than $1,000 US dollars to build the room and buy the inventory to get them started. Several people emailed me after reading the post about Bharat and asked if they could donate money. This would be a perfect opportunity for anyone to donate if they wish. You can email me at travel.pa@gmail.com if you would like to donate and I can give you the information on how to get money to Nepal Hope.

When we had finished talking with Bharat and his family I told them that I would not see them for a long while as I would be leaving for the US soon. Both he and his wife got teary eyed once again and I could not help joining them. They are amazing people and I am grateful that I was able to cross paths with them.